North Carolina Parenting Plan
Build a clear, child-focused plan that covers decision making, weekly schedules, holidays, exchanges, communication, travel, and what to do if things change.
Who this helps
Parents in North Carolina who want a parenting plan that works day to day and holds up in court. The focus here is practical language you can discuss in mediation or with your attorney.
What a North Carolina parenting plan covers
- Legal custody — who makes major decisions about school, medical care, religion, and activities.
- Physical custody / parenting time — where the child lives on school nights, weekends, holidays, and breaks.
- Logistics — exchanges, transportation, communication rules, right of first refusal, records access.
- Safety — alcohol or substance limits, supervision terms, safe exchange locations.
- Change and conflict — mediation steps, tie-break process, and how to modify if life shifts.
Legal custody vs. physical custody
Legal custody may be joint, sole, or joint with one parent as tie-breaker for defined topics. Spell out domains:
- Education — school choice, IEP/504 meetings, tutoring.
- Health — non-emergency care, therapy, orthodontia, vaccinations.
- Activities — sports, lessons, travel teams, time demands and costs.
- Religion — participation and scheduling limits.
Physical custody addresses the living schedule, exchanges, and travel. Courts look at best interests factors and the child’s needs at each age.
Weekly schedules that work
Pick a pattern that fits school, commute, caregiving bandwidth, and the child’s stage. Popular options:
- 2-2-3 — frequent contact for young kids.
- 2-2-5-5 — steady school-night rhythm.
- 3-4-4-3 — simple week view, fewer exchanges.
- Week-on / week-off — teens and longer blocks.
- Primary-home schedule — one home for school nights, alternating weekends with midweek dinner or overnight.
- Nesting — child stays in one home while parents rotate in and out. Good short term during transition.
Age-smart tweaks
- Infants and toddlers — shorter blocks, consistent handoff times, daytime visits if overnights are not ready.
- Preschool — 2-2-3 or 2-2-5-5 with steady bedtime routines.
- School-age — homework windows, activity drives, predictable school-night rules in both homes.
- Teens — longer blocks, sports travel, space for exams and jobs, phone autonomy with reasonable limits.
Holidays, breaks, and summer
Holiday time overrides the regular week. Rotate even/odd years or split each holiday. Define start and end times to the minute.
- School breaks — fall, winter, spring. Alternate or split by halves.
- Summer — keep the school-year pattern or switch to larger blocks with camp and travel windows.
- Birthdays and special days — fixed time windows that do not disturb bedtime.
Exchanges and transportation
- Location — curbside at the receiving parent’s home, a neutral public spot, or the school handoff.
- Late pickups — grace period and notice method.
- School handoffs — cleanest option for conflict reduction.
- Supervised exchanges or visitation — when safety or conflict requires it.
Communication rules
- Parent-to-parent — email or app for schedule changes; response time standard.
- Child contact — regular video or phone windows; no monitoring, brief and age-appropriate.
- Records access — both parents may access school portals and medical records.
Right of first refusal
If a parent needs childcare beyond a set number of hours, offer the other parent the time first. Define the threshold, how to offer, and response window.
School, health care, and activities
- Homework — both homes support assignments and return of materials.
- Appointments — share dates in the family app; either parent may attend.
- Costs — split uninsured medical and agreed activities by percentage or set dollar caps.
Travel and relocation
- Travel notice — itinerary, lodging, and emergency contact by a set deadline.
- Passports — storage and signature rules.
- Relocation — notice period, mediation step, and a review of the schedule if a move affects school or exchanges. UCCJEA jurisdiction rules still apply.
Safety clauses
- Substance limits — no alcohol or impairing drugs during parenting time or within a defined period before exchanges.
- Domestic violence — 50B orders control. Exchange at a safe place or through school.
- New partners — cooling-off period before overnights; no introductions during a pending custody evaluation.
Dispute steps
- Talk by email or a family app within a short response window.
- Mediation if talking fails.
- Named tie-breaker for a narrow topic, or court if needed.
When and how to modify
Plans can change after a substantial change in circumstances that affects the child. Keep school notes, calendars, and messages. If both parents agree, file a consent order. If not, talk to a lawyer about filing to modify.
Sample parenting plan clauses
Decision making
Parents share joint legal custody. They will consult on education, non-emergency health care, and activities. If they cannot agree after good-faith discussion within five days, Parent A decides education; Parent B decides non-emergency health care; either may decide routine activities during his or her time.
Weekly schedule
During the school year the child follows a 2-2-5-5 schedule with exchanges at school. Summer shifts to week-on / week-off with exchanges on Sundays at 6:00 p.m.
Holidays
Holiday time overrides the regular schedule. Even years: Parent A has Thanksgiving from Wednesday after school to Sunday at 6:00 p.m.; Parent B has Winter Break first half. Odd years reverse. School breaks split by halves.
Right of first refusal
If a parent needs childcare longer than six hours, that parent offers the time to the other parent by text and email. The offer expires after two hours.
Communication
Each parent may have one 15-minute video call on non-custodial days between 6:30–8:00 p.m. The call is private and age-appropriate.
FAQ
Do North Carolina courts prefer joint custody?
Courts start with the child’s best interests, not a preset split. Many cases land on shared decision making with a schedule the child can handle.
Can we write our own parenting plan?
Yes. Many parents draft terms and finalize in mediation. Have a lawyer review before filing.
What if the other parent will not follow the plan?
Document the issue, try the dispute steps, then speak with a lawyer about enforcement or a motion to modify.
General information only, not legal advice.